journal entries # 2.16.26

when the body

touched down
in the shallow paupers
grave

the earth held it
like it had not been
held

and the face
bloodless looked
up blind

searching the sky
for the soul



i could not explain away the lacuna without consulting the gods who told me in a hundred beads fallen from my wrist in a sun shower in the middle of the night where I had been. remembering I cried. and wrote it down as fast as I could before it went out on the tides


invasion of dawn over the land … choreographed waves of influencers and who is who in a sanitized place beam out in sizzling satellite emissions then recede … in the silence in the dark I can finally breathe. I can feel joy and heartache and love living

it was freeing seeing her reflection touching nail beds to the curve of this planet she carved each follicle uplifting her thoughts drifting farther from the ache of memory chrome of razor catching light beneath her wrist like the lake where he drowned





by #katyamills

journal entry #5

2.9.26 

all I am is breath. transparency. like the materials you chose to adorn me with. pellucidity of desire. my bones dissolve in your embrace deep in these high count hotel casino sheets. tonight I bring you luck. I am your ace

2.2.26 

only you can. they cannot imprison your soul

2.3.26 

the pain I endure comes less from culture wars and dissipated love or the malaise I feel in my tummy than from the minutes the hours rife with possibility I squander in the doomscrolling semiconsciousness of this our modern age


2.4.26 

the photo of her fell off the wall. her mother and sister recalled it was just after breakfast. they were picking up the shattered glass. only much later did they learn she had lost her life that morning. many miles away in Vienna.


2.5.26 

destitute unwashed unshaven uncertain if he was hallucinating a world full of apathy toward his condition he left with one charitable gaze from an otherwise insolent boy lambent in heart


2.6.26 

the wound came in various colors across the years and could not fully heal without the medicine you were unwilling to give. your apathy betrayed you. I cared less and less and less (about you). I guess it was contagious. It is sad. Yet I feel so deeply I know I've moved on


2.7.26 

before where she stood she saw what was not there. her blood her heart made itself known in her chest pursued by the shadow she cannot best. terrified to believe she was no different than them. this inheritance of mine. can it not be sublimated for good?

2.8.26

so pale
the world becomes 

by the end when the shadow 

once integrated 

disintegrated

by #katyamills 2026

journal entry #4

1.27.26 unwilling to stay in line or lane we produced some wax for the #wane went against the grain and got chided and derided which was only reinforcing as we sang and danced to music they could not even seem to feel and is not that strange? #vss365

1.25.26 there is no #ruse left you could use I have seen them all. and when you haunt our shared location you will feel my distance. you lose. i give flowers only to those I choose #vss365

1.29.26 the title was dropped in the wrong box of which I was unaware. they placed it by my door at the top of the stair. my little head put it together and I was serene. for this thoughtfulness did #obfuscate the general malaise which saddens my gaze #vss365

1.28.26 a #quiver in the river of thought and I made this mistake. to follow one of a thousand diversions. and the river dried up. its bed harbored coyotes traveling west on the train tracks needing to rest. good. i was left hollow and still. breathing #vss365

1.31.26 little could #soothe a jaded heart but he brought over an ice cream cake just the same. day before their birth. joy sparked 4 a sec. is he dead yet? naw. what kind of planet? idk. but we have our dreams. #vss365




by #katyamills 2026

(originally posted on twitter and bluesky's daily vss threads)

journal entry #3

1.23.26 while they #drizzle us with promises and stir our dying embers into a flickering hope licking the smoggy air i go about my rituals polishing my boots to shine and kick the everlasting tar out of some innocent dandelion as I tread the weary similitudes

1.21.26 the hardships made her brittle and broke her. she would never be that delicate heart again. she was resolute and when the winds picked up she tied her hair back flexed her psychology to #bend and move through any storm

1.22.26 she got thrown off again and all the bearings she intended upon gone her emotions unraveled and she became #unmoored. she wasn't a big drinker but a solid vodka cranberry did the trick. it's not often you discover your mate leaves you for another

1.24.26 you let the confidence #slip. I could not protect you anymore. I was up all night distraught. The tides cruel with rip. My heart carried yours to a distant star where you might not be sought. The fabrics were made of ionic sticking waters. the currency empathic tears

1.20.26 out of nothingness made of antiquated politics & algorithmic static ... inspiration #looms and takes hold. how do i fight for my life when lulled to sleep? imagine ... stay alert ... create ... listen ... write

1.16.26 no #searing pain today just a watercolor that could even wash away as the sun peaks and the staircase creaks and the heron speaks

1.17.26 the interrogation was going quite well indeed the walls #dappled with her blood and she came to arms tied behind her at the wrists and spat at her audience. raise the curtain! let the fucking show begin

here is the link to a biography I just published! a story of a humble farmer and his immigration from Sinaloa to California in the 1940's ... https://www.amazon.com/Life-Times-Felipe-Limon-Dominguez/dp/B0GHR7TXC9

by  #katyamills  

2026

BIOGRAPHY

Hi I just published an #immigrant story and brief #biography of a great man who passed away last year age 99. Paperback coming soon. This is the E - edition ...

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0GHGP1BBQ/

fiction / story

a story I published. fiction 

https://latinosenglishedition.blog/2026/01/16/governess-by-katya-mills/

journal entries 2

1.14.26 my thoughts off-center wonky I herded them into the pot and put them on a boil while I located my spine. it was January and the days ahead promised madness and terror, domination over love. bright smiles and kittens would not be enough

1.13.26 idea 4 when you're struggling. talk to yourself like your best friend sitting on the stoop in the old hood in the evening and you can here the cicadas and give yourself some encouragement and wisdom to carry on

1.11.26 years ago it would be kooky or straight up sci-fi to think you could have a video of a life being taken and blamed for their own death. but if you're a minority of any kind you know it's been this way forever and the only solution is you me we

1.10.26 encountering the sky and the horizon the moon and the stars and rising sun unmissable for any warrior summoning capacity to fight the powers that be in creative not violent ways

1.9.26 your delivery is meaningful. will you lift your arms and cut the air with ominous intent and issue dull insensate biased half-truths? you are dead to us. we do respect our dead but we speak of them in the past tense.

1.15.26 how do you explain it was it the whiskey on your breath? something broke you up and got you heartfelt in your era of not giving a fuck. talk to me. let's open it up some. I like it. I almost forgot you had it in you.

#katyamills