she who walks deserts without water for days, when struck by lightning, pays

i liked to watch my back
hypervigilance
my dance
my hobby


 i could spot
sentient scoundrels
in any building
lobby

i was quiet,
hypersensitive
dubbed
not quite disordered...
moody

they arrived
my moods
in varied shade of green

i welcomed them
true
as the thirsty
welcome water
varied shades of blue...
colder
hotter

water
sky
apple
 eye

open to talk to anybody
anytime
or drop, deafening silence...
on a nickel
on a dime

 i was usually first
to manifest
silent hesitation
hesitating?
when manifest ceased
before starting again

well its not so hard!
regard:
hold your tongue
press down hard!

i decided one day
as I came upon a crowd
to make a choice
to change
and amplify it!
loud!

The choice? is unrelated
kinda
uneventful...

chose not to delve into it
No need!
its sentimental!

okay, okay
it had to do with someone
i liked
-okay, loved-
you know?
the ones we wanted to be with

i followed this dream
far as my constitution could
to a place where dreams
resemble Hollywood

i found myself there
some new discovered space
food and warmth made for comfort
outside the human race

 i could not quite understand?
when i finally understood
mental clarity she arose!
out the gutter
out the ghetto
equipped with street science ph.d
from the hood
for freedom
not for free


just laundering
all lifes drama
in the spinning threads
of my mind

turned me a shade
more mellow
over time

i think it was the apples
turned my pee
such a frightful
yellow

i searched for solace
in a book on cosmos theory
yellow was marked 'second-tier'
somehow more evolved?

or was it gold?
or was it canary?
the theory
made me leery
 
in practice
i would read auras
in time
to be sure

in theory
made me weary

so good night
to one
good night
to all

walk away
down the hall